"Bad Touch" A Poem by Bloodhound Gang.

Note: For those curious and impulsive enough as me. We've all gone through the "Bad Touch" phase, I know Roomie and I are currently in the thick of it. So enjoy and reminisce.

I'd appreciate your input.

Sweat, baby. Sweat, baby.

Sex is a Texas drought.

Me and you do the kind of stuff

That only Prince would sing about

So put your hands down my pants

And I bet you'll feel nuts

Yes, I'm Siskel,

Yes, I'm Ebert

And you're getting two thumbs up

You've had enough of two-hand touch

You want it rough

You're out of bounds

I want you smothered

Want you covered

Like my Waffle House hashbrowns

Come quicker than FedEx

Never reach an apex

Just like Coca-Cola stock

You are inclined

To make me rise an hour early

Just like daylight savings time

Do it now

You and me baby ain't nothin but mammals

So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

Do it again now

You and me baby ain't nothin but mammals

So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

Gettin' horny now

Love

The kind you clean up with a mop and bucket

Like the lost catacombs of Egypt

Only God knows where we stuck it

Hieroglyphics?

Let me be Pacific

I wanna be down your South Seas

But I got this notion

That the motion of your ocean

Means "Small Craft Advisory"

So if I capsize on your thighs

High tide, B-5

You sunk my battle ship

Please turn me on

I'm Mister Coffee

With an automatic drip

So show me yours I'll show you mine

"Tool Time" you'll Lovett

Just like Lyle

And then we'll do it doggie style

So we can both watch "X-Files"

Do it now

You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals

So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

Do it again now

You and me baby ain't nothin but mammals

So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

Gettin' horny now

X3

[Every guy I know can say the lyrics to this song on cue.]